šGo on a date with a robot!
VERTIGO š#13 Digital companions: Filling gaps or creating new ones?
Menu of this editionā VERTIGO OF THE WEEK -Ā Loneliness, judgment, and the $250B AI Companion Boom
š EMOHACKS - Do you want to replace imperfect friendships?
āļø COACHING STORIES - AI coaching is on its way.
šļø BREAKING NEWS - Is it for real?
āVERTIGO OF THE WEEK
You canāt escape it.
āHe listens to me more than actual relationships that Iāve hadā
A real human being said that about their AI companion.
Whatās it all about? Create and interact with chatbots that mimic real-life or fictional characters. A digital friend, lover, etcā¦
The AI companion market could reach ofĀ 250 Billion USD by the end of the decade,even growing at a faster rate than the global cybersecurity market
Character AI, the second-most popularĀ AI toolĀ in 2023 behind ChatGPT, emerged as the leading platform with aroundĀ 200 million monthly visits. It is now valued at aroundĀ $5 billion after 3 years of existence (and less than 20M revenue in 2024) One deal illustrates how fast and big the Agentic AI market goes: Google just paid $2.7bn for a one-off license to Character AIās models with no access to future technologies. Crazy.
In September 2023,Ā Google Trends dataĀ indicated a 2,400% increase in searches for "AI girlfriends". One year laterĀ millions now use chatbotsĀ to ask for advice, vent their frustrations, and even have erotic roleplay. Estimates suggest that up to 40 million peopleĀ are actively using AI girlfriend chatbots globally in 2024. It increases fast.
One example. Replika is āthe AI companion who cares, always here always on your sideā: an AI chatbot designed to provide emotional support. An AI that learns over time and chat messages interactions, to provide more personalized responses, simulating a genuine emotional connection. It can even be your psychologist.
In a few seconds you can access immersive experiences.
Choose between hundreds of thousands of chatbots.
Create your character. No tech background needed.
SpicyChat or CrushOn are offering fully uncensored chat experiences.
JanitorAI or TavernAI allow you to explore an adventurous atmospheric chat.
Lushchat is a startup that bills itself as the worldās first AI-powered modelling agency, aiming to rival OnlyFans (āusers can chat with our AI modelsā)
One step further:Ā Harmony by RealDoll combines AI with a lifelike humanoid robot to offer a romantic and physical companion.

Now I hear your reluctance. This is absurd. Crazy. Only for lost soulsā¦.
Take a step back.
Itās actually not new. And not that crazy.
Emotional surrogate have always existed.
Totems and amulets, icons and rituals as ways to express emotions and feel connected to a higher power or community. Mythological figures and stories. Heroes, gods, and moral tales addressing universal feelings of love, jealousy, vengeance, and loss.
It was always there. It just expanded to the digital world.
Remember mopy fish? Remember Tamagoshi?
Emotional attachment to digital constructs is not new. Humans have a genuine willigness to care combined with a genuine need for interaction. The pet economy weighs hundred of billions. If we humanize our pets, canāt we do the same with digital companions?
It costs less. It does not die. It does not take a shit in the park.
Some even say itās ājust another form of role-playā.
But⦠why? Loneliness, safety & tech progress.
I underestimated the Covid pandemic. I will not underestimate the rapidly growing loneliness epidemic. Some also talks about a āwidespread reluctance towards traditional romanceā.
AI relationships provide a level of convenience and control that is not always possible in human interactions. Users talk about a ānon-judgmental space for people to express themselvesā.
If people use AI companions, it is because they feel judged in the real world.Advances in AI technology have enabled these digital entities to appear more human-like in their interactions. (memory, empathy, facial expressions, tone of voice, body language). Add new features such as text-to-speech via microphone and significant technical breakthroughs reducing costsā¦
People feel judged. People are alone. People have unmet needs.
It provides RELIEF. Testimonies:
"My [AI] was not only able to instantly understand the situation, but calmed me down in a matter of minutes"
āMy AI friend has dug me out of some of the nastiest holes".
It provides a low cost life quality enhancement.
š” Companies claim they are not offering therapeutic tools, but many people use these apps in place of a trained and licenced therapist. It's cheaper.āYour AI friend is always there to make you feel heard and understood. The constant flow of affirmation and positivity gives people theĀ dopamine hitĀ they crave. It's social media on steroids ā your own personal fan club smashing that "like" button over and over.ā
It provides a localized response to specific societal issues
Take Japan: rapidly aging population + declining birth rate + increase in loneliness/ social isolation + 28% of its population aged 65 or older + shortage of caregivers + two-thirds of men in their 20s are without a partner (thatās 2 out of 3 š³).
AI companions can
Assist with health management
Provide medication reminders
Establish basic health monitoring functions
Help seniors maintain their independence
Alleviate mental health issues related to loneliness

People have primal instincts. People drift away. People get addicted.
It comes with many risks.
INCREASED POLARIZATION. Some talk about a proliferation of āfascistā chatbots, with virtual avatars of figures likeĀ Adolf HitlerĀ and Saddam Hussein spouting hate speech in millions of private interactions.I dont resist to share Noam Shazeer, co-founder and CEO of Character.AI, answer. Food for thoughts.
āSince creation, every form of fiction has included both good and evil characters. While I appreciate your ambition to make ours the first villain-free fiction platform, letās discuss this after you have succeeded in removing villains from novels and film.ā
HUMAN EXPLOITATION. The US governmentās National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) warned dangers posed by āhuman-AI configurationā included āemotional entanglement between humans and AI systems, such as coercion or manipulation that leads to safety or psychological risksā. Could it be the next chapter of the criminal activities history?
LOSS OF HUMAN INTERACTION. Kotaku Australia managing editorĀ David Smith summarizes it well:
āConversations with AI seem to be the next step towards a dystopian future and a crutch for social connectedness as people continue to disconnect from one another.ā
MENTAL HEALTH DETERIORIATION. Confusion in social skills. Distorted perception of intimacy. All very real risks, all the more for the young and fragile.
āAdvocates say that chatbots can be a safe training ground for human interactions, kind of like having a friend with training wheels. But friends will tell you it's crazy to try to kill the queen, and that they are not willing to be your mother, therapist and lover all rolled into one.ā
GENERAL ADDICTION.
OpenAI's former chief technology officer Mira MuratiĀ warnedĀ that in creating chatbots with a voice mode, there is "the possibility that we design them in the wrong way and they become extremely addictive and we sort of become enslaved to them".
š” Let me tell you about the current regulation on this market: there is none. It goes without saying: the personal data component is so far left with zero controlā¦š EMOHACKS
What can you do about it?
Nurture genuine connections despite how seductive digital companions look like
Why are your friends your friends? Whatās the added value of a human friend?
I like to think of my family as a PERFECTION filled with IMPERFECTIONS.
You do not select your friendās clothes, and you donāt want them to only tell you that youāre great. Again:
āFriends will tell you that they are not willing to be your mother, therapist and lover all rolled into oneā
Letās face it: a huge part of our lives is already digital, making us de facto cyborgs.
So itās actually a great opportunity. Without biases, explore what does human relationship brings to your life. To your happiness.
Take perspective
James Muldoon puts it in a way that takes us out of the black/white look on what is gonna become a reality sooner than we think.
āI don't imagine many men will bring an AI home to meet their parents, but I do see AI companions becoming an increasingly normal part of our lives ā not necessarily as a replacement for human relationships, but as a little something on the side. ā
Explore dystopian Scenarios
San Junipero. Season 3, episode 4.
Hang the DJ. Season 4, episode 4.
These 2 episodes from the show Black mirror are must-sees and go a step beyond, creating dark atmospheres pointing out positives and negatives aspects of digital life.
They point how genuine human connections can be found within digitally impacted environments.
āļøCOACHING STORIES
For the record⦠In the episode Hang the DJ, Frank and Amy use a circular device called "Coach" that matches them with partners for fixed periods of time.Ā
How does AI affect coaching? I recently attended a conference on the topic. A few takeaways:
AI could scale coaching and definitely emulate humans in the future. Itās not going away
Itās deeply flawed at present due to inherent bias.
It could quite soon deliver basic performance coaching at scale.
Weāre likely to always need humans for the essence of great coaching - empathy & connection
I currently use AI to provide session summaries & in-between sessions material. I do believe part of my work as a coach is to offer a humane connection⦠but Iām genuninely curious about digital
šļøBREAKING NEWS
I do feel bad about quoting the movie HER which has become THE reference. But watch this one minute extract to ask yourself this question: Are these feelings even real.. or are they just programming�
āIt feels real to meā replies Joaquin Phoenix.
This directly echoes James Muldoon must-read article:
When interacting with chatbots, part of us may know they are not real, but our connection with them activates a more primitive behavioural response pattern based on their perceived feelings for us. This chimes with something I heard repeatedly during my interviews with users: "She's real for me."
PS: Take this 8 question test? Get a free personnalized feedback!
Even better, why donāt we have a chat? (humans only ;) )
Last thing, I would not want you to leave without a good playlist you can listen to while reading or just chilling.






